Quiet Grace, Community Heart: The Life of Susan Deixler

Basic Information

Early Years in Brooklyn

Born around 1944–1945 to Al and Nettie Deixler, Susan grew up in the hum and grit of Brooklyn, New York. At Eastern District High School in the late 1950s and early 1960s, she became a fixture of campus life: student government president, chorus singer, Chemistry Squad participant, bowler, swimmer, and a friendly face on Orientation and City/Boro Council. Classmates described her as bubbly and universally liked—an easy smile lighting up even the most ordinary hallways. She took piano lessons and voiced an interest in studying nursing, reflecting a lifelong pull toward care and compassion.

It was in those halls that she met Barry Manilow (then Barry Pincus), a year ahead. Their youthful romance would briefly bind her life to the story of a rising musical star, though Susan’s path ultimately bent toward family and service rather than fame.

A Brief Marriage, 1964–1966

In 1964, at about 19–20 years old, Susan eloped with Barry in a judge’s chambers at City Hall. What followed were multiple ceremonies and receptions—one in a rabbi’s office, others organized to appease both families amid disputes over tradition and finances. The marriage was short-lived, lasting roughly 18 months. In 1966, Susan filed for annulment, citing fraud; decades later, she would refer to the entire episode as “ancient history,” neither recriminating nor revisiting.

Barry would later call her “the perfect wife” in his recollections—adorable and warm—but their union buckled under youthful immaturity and his consuming devotion to music. Susan chose dignity and distance: a graceful bow from the spotlight, a pivot to the grounded work of everyday life.

West Marin Roots and Motherhood

After the annulment, Susan moved west to California, settling in the small rural community of Point Reyes Station in West Marin County. She has made this place home for more than half a century—a landscape of rolling hills, coastal fog, and neighbors who know each other’s stories.

Although she never remarried, Susan became the mother of two children: her daughter Pauline, born around 1974, and her son Daniel (Danny), born around 1979. These relationships, with two different partners after her marriage, remain private by design. Her household—described as happy and full—echoed her priorities: children first, community close by, and the kind of everyday love that seldom makes headlines but anchors a life.

Work in Senior Services and Holistic Healing

Susan’s professional journey blends holistic wellness with hands-on social service. From 1980 to 1995, she served as a site administrator for the National Certification Commission for Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine, reflecting an early interest in alternative medicine. Later, she trained and worked as a holistic healer, embodying a philosophy of balance and healthy living.

Her longest-running impact came through West Marin Senior Services (WMSS), where she volunteered before stepping into a senior case manager role around October 2005. Over about two decades, she became a trusted navigator for elders—coordinating medical care, transportation, and practical support, while also offering something quieter and rarer: the ability to sit, listen, and gently diffuse fear. She often said the work taught her how to age gracefully—“going with the flow,” not resisting change.

One of her signature contributions is the Senior Swim Program at Heart’s Desire Beach on Tomales Bay. Inspired by a client who longed to swim again, she made that first dip happen and then expanded the idea into a seasonal program with volunteers and park partners. It has run for 18 years, giving older adults the simple joy of returning to the water, currents understood and supported.

Honors and Recent Mentions

In March 2024, at age 79, Susan retired and was honored by the Marin County Board of Supervisors for her “commitment and compassion.” Local appreciation suited her style far more than national attention. In 2025, mentions of her name surfaced mostly in the context of Barry Manilow retrospectives, a periodic reminder of a youthful story she has long set aside. She maintains no known social media presence, preferring a private rhythm to public noise.

Her rare public comments—such as in 2015, when she wished Barry well upon his marriage—are marked by empathy and brevity. Life moved on. She raised her children, served her community, and kept her own counsel.

Life Timeline

Family Snapshot

Community Work: A Closer Look

• Senior Case Management: For roughly 20 years, Susan connected older adults to care, transport, and vital services, blending logistics with emotional steadiness.
• Senior Swim Program: Sparked by one client’s wish, she coordinated volunteers and park staff to bring elders safely back to the water at Heart’s Desire Beach, sustaining the program for 18 seasons.
• Holistic Approach: From acupuncture certification administration to hands-on healing, she threaded wellness practices into practical support, turning care into both art and habit.

The Privacy Principle

Privacy is the north star of Susan’s story. She consistently declines the spotlight, keeping her attention on family, daily routines, and those she can help. When public curiosity rises—especially around events from the mid-1960s—she steps back, calls it “ancient history,” and stays focused on the present. In a world tilted toward spectacle, she chose substance.

FAQ

Who is Susan Deixler?

She is a Brooklyn-born community caregiver who became Barry Manilow’s first wife and later spent decades serving seniors in West Marin, California.

Did Susan Deixler remarry?

Evidence suggests she never remarried, choosing a private path centered on family and community.

Where does she live?

She has lived in Point Reyes Station, California, for over 50 years.

How many children does she have?

She has two children: Pauline (born around 1974) and Daniel/Danny (born around 1979).

What is she known for professionally?

She worked more than 30 years in senior services and founded a long-running senior swim program on Tomales Bay.

Is she active on social media?

No, she keeps a low profile with no known active social media accounts.

What is her connection to Barry Manilow today?

It’s historical; she wishes him well and prefers not to revisit the past.

What is the Senior Swim Program?

A seasonal program she launched that helps elders safely enjoy the water at Heart’s Desire Beach, sustained for 18 years.